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Lene Taylor

I’m Not Your Boyfriend

By Lene Taylor

What does a boyfriend do?

He steps on your toes, he gets in the way, he acts like an ass. He gets jealous, he feels entitled—and then? He tells you his problems. Predictable.

From I Wish There Was Something I Could Quit, by Aaron Cometbus, © 2006.

Trey put down the book and sighed. Giselle, his beautiful, brown-haired, brown-eyed, brainy girlfriend, had given it to him weeks ago, saying she thought he would like it, because it was about people trying to figure out what to do with their lives. But he’d read nearly thirty pages and still didn’t get it. Did she mean that boyfriend stuff was about him? And he knew what he was going to do with his life, starting on the first day of this summer. He had a list:

#1. Work in the Wal-Mart warehouse and save money.

#2. Practice basketball every day.

#3. Hang out with Jordan.

#4. Get tan (but not too much –enough to show off blue eyes).

#5. Go off to college.

Working so much was going to suck, but even with his basketball scholarship in the fall, money was going to be tight once he was at the University of Albuquerque and not living with his parents anymore. Last summer had been all fun and games, working with Jordan, his best bud, and all his friends at that swanky country club, but now he was 18 and needed to act like an adult. He would work hard, and then study hard and play hard and make his parents proud.

But there was one more thing to add to the list:

#0. Break up with Giselle.

~~~~~~~end of excerpt~~~~~~~

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